From time to time I am prompted by events to begin a post by noting that my wife is a straight-up yogini. This is one of them.
Last night I came home from work having had a bit of a frustrating time only to be confronted by another annoying situation that we weren’t expecting. And truth be told, over the last 3 days or so, it seems karma has been coming ’round little annoying bits at a time, and steadily. Sometimes you remember to embrace that, and sometimes you don’t. Last night was one of those times when I was not embracing it. I always keep it in check but I was still visibly grumpy evidently. So whether I was indeed keeping it in check is debatable, I guess. My wife recognized it anyway.
The reason she’s a straight-up yogini this time is that everyone knows that when someone is pissed off, you’re supposed to say “What is your problem?” to which the person with the issue is supposed to respond by getting all angry because the other person called them on being angry.
But a yogini never does what she is supposed to do.
Instead she said “Why are you moody?”
I said “I don’t know” and went to be alone for a bit.
As I lay there in our bedroom, alone, her question resonated in my head. I couldn’t help but wonder whether I had in the brief moments since it happened, invented the softness in her voice as she asked me “Why are you moody?” But there was more. It was a softness but the words were perfectly chosen. She didn’t make me a “bad guy” for having this experience. She was inviting me to examine, from a observer’s point-of-view what was going on in my mind. To consider what unfulfilled attachments had led me to express myself grumpily. She did say “why are YOU moody?” but that is fine because one does have to take responsibility for his response to the day’s events. But in the end she was just asking me to figure out what outside events caused that moodiness.
I slept it off. You are allowed to do that, you know. But make sure that isn’t the full solution. First – or after, it doesn’t matter – you have to figure out what flustered you so that the best immediate response was unconsciousness.